29 June 2006

Good Lord! Why THAT title? or, GOOD LORD you're not talking about .... !?!

Why "Boregasm"? I have been inundated with this question by many of my invisible friends, including Roscoe, my invisible valet. And it's a fair question, even if the corporeality of the questioners is, itself, questionable.

Let's start with the coinage. I came up with it whilst riding through the Transcascadian Wilderness of Eastern Oregon on a hot day. Naturally, someone else came up with it first, and it's got its own definition(s):

1. boregasm

(bor- gasm) n. Similar to an orgasm but not quite as fun, a boregasm is a spasm of muscles in the body that occurs at a moment that is incredibly boring. --boregasmic or boregastic- adj.

"Wow dude, listening to your story gave me a huge boregasm."

"That tv show was totally boregasmic in every way."

"I had the most boregastic time at that party"
- by Cailin and Chloe Oregon Jul 23, 2005

2. boregasm

Opposite of an orgasm. You discover too late that a sex act is mindless/boring/bad but you've got no better place to be. Also known as a fake orgasm ...

- by hotboxin Deep space Nov 25, 2005

3. boregasm

Refers to the one moment after a long streak of boredom where you just can't take it anymore and you have to do something fun.

Geeze, the final speech of the Republican National Convention almost gave me a boregasm.

- by Pinko the Klown Sep 4, 2004
Of course, my definition is somewhat different and somewhat the same. In keeping with the oxymoronic nature of the original blog (i.e. you can't ski uphill, unless the laws of gravity have been seriously compromised, and 'S.U.' is the reverse of 'U.S.,' which represented the funhouse- mirror-version of democracy with which we've been gifted through George the Incurious, and Dick the Shooter), "Boregasm" represents our current oxymoron.

(And no, not George, if you please. There's no "oxy" in his description.)

An "orgasm" represents the ultimate spasm of pleasure. Boredom represents the utter absence of pleasure, or its diminuation into nothingness via endless repetition.

And, so, as the great historical spasm begins (the dominoes were already lined up, and pushed over), I find it difficult to get all that excited about the whirlwind that we're about to reap. We sowed the wind, after all.

So, "boregasm" seems like a good title for a jaded discussion of the Apocalypse (courtesy of Incurious and Shooter, their minions and backers) and the madness of the opposition.

An ejaculation of ennui, in other words. (But FUNNY words.)

And the metaphor extends more deeply, but I assure you, Gentle Reader, that it refers not in the least to the lasciviousness of the gross physical body and the pleasures of the flesh.

That kind of writing I get paid for.



Blogger Cap'n Crusty said...

Eyarrrr! Another blog sets sail. Will she stand tall at the mast and boldly sail the seven seas, or founder right out o' the harbor? Only time 'n' Neptune know, 'n' neither be talkin'

6/29/2006 10:59:00 AM  
Blogger Cap'n Crusty said...

Anybody been getting those damn term-limit petitions in the mail? I got my second one in as many weeks. I don't know where these wads got my address, but the last thing I need is some right-wing drip-dick from Bend telling me whom I can and can't vote for.

6/29/2006 11:50:00 AM  
Blogger Cap'n Crusty said...

Say, what the hell happened to Danuta? She run afoul of Musemeci...I mean, Arlie & Co? I went to tune her in on KOPT, and all I got was the "Stephanie Miller Funny Noise Show".

6/29/2006 05:37:00 PM  
Blogger ed waldo said...

1. It's an old blog refurbished for summer.

2. I've been getting those term limit petitions, too. I am planning a followup on this new group (Taxpayers United reborn under a new name with the same old out-of-state Right Wing funding?)

3. The official story is that Danuta has health issues (and she really had NOT wanted to do it in the first place, but was cajoled into it after she quit the first time) They were trying out the morning guy Mark something on the morning show this week, and running syndicated until they can replace her. Just what we need: another (Southern) Californian trying to get up to speed on Oregon, and at least six months of patronizing, sycophantic "it's so BEAUTIFOOOOOOL here" and "it sure rains a lot here," etc.

Don't they have anyone LOCAL who could do it? Guess not. I guess that one-size-fits-all mentality is being applied to Oregon (which never works). Oy.

Does that answer your questions, you crusty cap'n you?

6/30/2006 08:55:00 AM  
Blogger Cap'n Crusty said...

Yeppers, it do, thank ye kindly.

I looked a little closer at the second Term Limits thing I got, and noticed it had an Illinois return address. I guess we're so incompetent here that not only do we have to import radio "talent", but political organizers as well. Gawrsh, we're so dumb, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck.

This Mark character you mentioned...if that's the bozo that was subbing for the other SoCal host (regular, morning, initials Nancy Stapp), then I cringe. I caught a little of his schtick last week, and thought, Sweet Caroline, what a boring sack of road dumplings. In fact, I went to listen to Danuta just to get jazzed up, and...no Danuta.

One wonders if the KOPT (mis)management is deliberately trying to sabotage "progressive" radio in this town. Or whether it's just one more example of what flacid, lifeless, bleached-out, mega-inoffensive Eugene liberalism demands.


6/30/2006 09:56:00 AM  

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